5 verses for you Terry

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid...for the Lord God goes with you...He will never leave you.  Deuteronomy 31:6


Then you will know the truth and the truth will set you free.  John 8:32


Let the wicked forsake his way and the unrighteous man his thoughts; and let him return to the Lord, and He will have mercy on him, for He will abundantly pardon.  For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways.  Isaiah 55:7&8


May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Spirit.  Romans 15:13


I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.  Philippians 4:13



I have told Terry several times that he needs to pick 5 verses that will strengthen and encourage him in his battles...verses to help him fight the thoughts that invade and consume his mind...that he might be able to combat the lies and find hope in the truth. He has been studying all aspects of the word, which I have felt has overwhelmed him, so I am now picking 5 verses to give to him tonight when I see him to help him achieve this. I will probably prepare another 5 for my next visit because it was hard to just narrow to these.

sharing a note of encouragement to me...

Misty,

===== forwarded your last e-mail to me since it was a lot of details to remember to tell me.

I just wanted to tell you that I am praying for you (and Terry) throughout the day and I want to encourage you in the Lord. Also, I appreciate you giving of yourself and your time to be a help to him, even when he doesn't seem to appreciate it.

Being on the giving end of things is where the Lord wants us to be. You are a good example to us.

Take care,
Your christian brother,
====

Dear Terry

I love you very much!  If I could only get you to understand how much.  God loves you even more than I do...He has forgiven all your sins and made each day a new day that you can start over fresh, clean and impowered thru His strength.  I know life has been very hard for you, has dealt you some tough things, and has been a great challenge and overwhelming in many ways.  I know that you are discouraged and don't feel you have any hope in this life.  Please know that I will be here for you, I will help you and encourage you through everything.  You have great potential and can do so much with your life.  Don't give up!  Please don't!!! 

With many thoughts, prayers, love and hugs,

Misty

another update on Terry

The social worker for Terry at the Behavior Health Unit in the hospital called me this morning and wanted to talk to me and ask me some questions regarding his situation.  We talked for about17minutes.  She wanted me to know that so far Terry is not cooperating this morning and wants to go "ama" (against medical advice).  She is not sure what the outcome will be at this time or where things will go from here.  He was admitted to the Behavior Health Program on a voluntary basis.  If he changes his agreement to that, that will change what they do with him.   She said they want him to be there 3-5days and to get him stable and adjust his medications. I made sure she was aware that we want him to receive all the help he can and confirmed with her that I will be there in the one hour and fifteen minute timeframe that I am allowed to come and visit him each day.

sharing a note of encouragement to me...

You’re such a good sister! Hang in there, girl. I know it has to be so hard, but the Lord will give you the strength to love and help Terry.

I’m continually praying for both of you.

With much love and a hug!

another update on Terry

When I arrived tonight to see Terry, the nurse would not let me in because there were already two people in the room.  They had not done this with me before, so I was a bit shocked at her persistence even though I am family.  I think it might be because we pushed our luck with 5 of us in the room last night when we were doing the legal paperwork.  :) 

Mark & Bev were visiting, so Bev came out and she & I visited a bit in the hallway.  Mark came out a little bit later as the doctor wanted to talk to Terry.  After the doctor finished his talk with Terry, he came out and informed me that he has given the clearance for Terry to be moved from the CICVU to the Behavioral Health floor.  He said he had his physiatric evaluation today which went good.  When I asked for an update, he said he would refer to that doctor to give me his assessment but that he would recommed Terry be put through a program.  I then visited with Terry for about 10-15min while they finished preparing to get him transferred.  He didn't have lunch but did eat dinner.  He said Weymen Zelder had been by along with Russell Ross and Daniel Sollenberger over the lunch period.  Mark, Bev & I went with Terry to the third floor to get him settled.  We were only allowed in thru part of the process, the explanation part & paperwork process along with an explanation of the visitation process and rules. The nurse informed us that most people are there 3-5days as it is a transitional phase to the next step.It is much more restrictive on how they do things then even ICU.  You must have his ID# to be allowed in to see him or to even talk to them over the phone.  There is one hour and fifteen minutes a day Monday - Friday that he can have visitors, only two at a time and the nurse said they will not let more than two in period.  Saturday and Sunday there is a one hour period and the same hour and fifteen minutes of the weekday slot.  I don't think Terry was really thrilled about having to stay in the hospital but I think its the best thing for him right now.  It will be 24hours before I can see him again and I will continue to try to update everyone on where things are.

another update on Terry

I went to see Terry on my way to work and arrived about 08:20am.  Jeff was there and the two of them were visiting.  Terry was more alert and awake, but his demeanor was not as pleasant as it was last night.  He didn't want to eat breakfast, expressed he still doesn't want to live, he has no hope, doesn't deserve to be treated well, blames himself for everything, etc.  Jeff tried to help with the areas that he needs to overcome truth with the lies he is believing, but it was met with resistance.  Jeff left about 30min after I arrived and I stayed another 45min.  I had a meeting scheduled over lunch with my client and knew I would not be able to make it back so I decided to stay and to visit a bit more with him and go into work late.  By the time I left I had convinced him to eat half of his breakfast even though he said it was not very tasty.  We read two different passages while I was there, Isaiah 55 and Proverbs 30, as he requested me to read. 

another update on Terry

I saw Terry tonight along with Tom & JoLinda. He was sitting up in bed and did not have oxygen on at all, very good sign. He said he was hungry and they said he could have more hot broth, but no solid foods yet. He was talking more and much more alert. We got Power of Attorney paperwork completed. Sylvia Woodall notarized the form. Michelle & Uncle Tom were witnesses. Uncle Tom had quite a bit of time with him while we waited in the waiting room area. We left the hospital about 9.30pm and went to IHOP as none of us had eaten dinner yet. He is to have his physiatric evaluation tomorrow and after that they should move him to the 3rd floor to that division, hopefully sometime tomorrow.

Thanks for all your continued prayers. I am still doing well, but beginning to be exhausted, hopefully a bit more sleep will do the trick.

another update on Terry

I went to the hospital at lunch and spent 90minutes with Terry.  He was asleep when I got there, but woke up and started visiting.  The ventilator had been removed and his voice was very raspy.  He was very hungry and had his first meal, liquids that consisted of: cranberry juice, lemonade, a boost drink, chicken broth, and jello.  He did well.  We chatted most the time, some of what he said made sense, some of it didn't.  He was still groggy from his medications.  He confirmed that Mom was the last person he talked to.  He talked to Mindy at 8pm Sunday night, me at 8.15pm and then Mom.  He had informed both Mom & Mindy that he was depressed and didn't want to live and really wanted to die.  He did not tell me this when he called.  His call was short and just to let me know that he was tired and was going to bed and hoped I had a good week at work.  I told him I hoped he did too and that we would get together later in the week.  We will know more about his mental state as the day wears on.  He did not remember me being there this morning, but I would expect that.

another update on Terry

I was at the hospital this morning, 8am-8.50am.  Sylvia Woodall met me up there and Jeff arrived while the doctor was talking to us. They were waking Terry up and going to draw blood after he stayed awak for awhile (an hour or so) and make sure his lungs were functioning the way they should be and that his oxygen levels stayed good with the goal to have him breathe on his own. He was frustrated at wanting to try to talk but with the ventilator in his mouth, he couldn't.  We got a piece of paper and held it for him to try and write us messages.  He wrote words on top of words and his writing at times was very hard to read, but we did our best to make things out.  He got tears in his eyes when I told him I loved him, that he was going to make it and that I wanted him to succeed.  The doctor said his pupils are good, vital signs are good, organs are functioning and things seem to be progressing nicely.   One of his doctors stressed very strongly that Terry needs lots of help.  I am aware of this and so are others,  I do not think any of us are ignorant of that fact nor are we opposed to the help they can give him. Though the Lord is who Terry needs the most, I do think the doctors need to get him stablized on medications and therapy. I will go back at lunch.

another update on Terry

I contacted my Granma Omi to update her on the situation of things and then went up to the hospital at the time of visiting hours, 8pm tonight. He opened his eyes in a dazzed sense and moved his head towards me but did not focus on me. Nelson &Shirley King went with me and we stayed about 20minutes. I talked to him a little bit trying to just register that I was there. 

I then went to Jeff's to read the letter that he left us (the family).

I appreciate the love, care, concern and prayers...Please keep all involved in your prayers that we have wisdom to know how to help and what to do from here.

another update on Terry

I went up to the hospital again at lunch but she had just given him some more medicine so I didn't talk to him. She said he will be there at least a few days. On my way back from the hospital to work I notified Mindy of what had happened and where things stood as of now.  Terry has had a few visitors, but of course he will not remember them.

another update on Terry

Jeff stopped by the hospital and then my work about 11am to give me an update. He said Terry nodded when he talked to him and he was pretty sure that he recognized his voice though he didn't do anything other than flutter his eyelids. The nurse asked him to squeeze his hand but he didn't. It will take more time for him to waken up and for us to know his progress. He is thrashing quite violently.

another update on Terry

I went to the hospital on my way to work to see him this morning about 8.45am.  Judy Lane met me there to be of support. He was unresponsive to me. Russell Ross had already been there and left him a note with verses on the bulletin board. I went thru Terry's belongings (let me spare you what I went thru and confirmed the fact that I could not be a nurse) in the "personal belongings bag" to try to see if I could find his cell phone and if it would power on to see who the last person was he talked to.  It was dead and would not power on.

Quotes

A journey of a thousand miles begins within a single step.
~ Chinese Proverb

some sad news on Terry

It is late, almost midnight to be exact, but I can't sleep...therefore I decided to update my blog...an update on my brother...be prepared, this is sad news.

Terry has been living here in Texas 5 months, nearly to the day.  He was found laying on his side on the floor in his bedroom overdosed tonight about 7.30-8pm. He probably had been there all day, we are not for sure. He was unresponsive, no medication bottles around, dressed in his clothes, with notes left to Jeff and Mom & Dad & Sisters. It was an obvious attempt at suicide, we just don't know with what. His PCP was called and so was 911. The paramedics started pumping his stomach immediately and he was taken to a local hospital. I did not go up there as it was not recommended I do because of his state. There is nothing I can do until he wakes up...if he does. They are unsure if he has brain damage, either from falling, or lack of oxygen. This will be told after more tests and time. It could take a couple days to know more.

I am fine. I have not cried, yet. I am sure I will...but right now, I am holding up pretty well, just trying to put everything in perspective...what could I have done differently?  what could I have said? what could I have done? what is it going to take for him to realize that he is loved and has such great potential?  He has been having a few tough weeks, so in many ways this is not a surprise. My heart achs for him to live differently, but according to his doctor, he may never be able to after having messed with some of the drugs he has messed with that really mess up your mind. Doctor says he probably has not been taking his medicine like he should have been and this might be one of the reasons that he has been acting the way he has. Its hard to know. You don't want to give him an excuse, neither do you want him to have an "out" for being angry, but if he needs the medicine you want him to take it. Its hard place to be in. If he doesn't make it, it might be the best thing for him...he will be HOME with our Heavenly Father!

I will update my blog as I have time....in the meantime, please pray for him...and me that I will have the wisdom to know how to help him if he survives.  Thank you my friends!

Quotes

Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain.
~ unknown

soon a baby girl for Travis & Sarah!

I used to work at the Cabbage Rose Quilting & Knitting Store where I taught knitting lessons and sewed demos for the store.  I made a really cute skirt out of Amy Butler fabrics that I cut into squares and sewed together (picture later if I can find one).  The skirt was cut out on the bias and was adorable.  Well, I had leftover squares sitting in my stash of fabric, so I decided to piece a baby quilt with them.  I started the project nearly 2 years ago for someone and never got it finished...the quilt top was done, but that was it.  So a few weeks ago when I was supposed to help with a baby shower (and ended up not doing very much because I got sick and couldn't), I realized that one of my friends due date for her first baby was rapidly approaching and I had started nothing yet!!!  So I dug in the project started stash drawer and pulled this unfinished quilt out!  Though Sarah is doing pink and white in her baby room, its is always fun to have a stack of blankets and quilts available for use, so I decided it was time to get it done and would be perfect for Sarah's little girl. I do not have pictures of the process, so you will have to imagine the process or if you want tips on how I did it, email me.

CONGRATULATIONS
Travis & Sarah!!!

Brian Tracy Quote of the Day

All growth depends upon activity. There is no development physically or intellectually without effort, and effort means work.
- Calvin Coolidge, 30th U.S. president

Quotes

Train yourself to sustain yourself.
~ Pauline Baker

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