Gerald Rogers
You do certain things through mastery and a recipe to get you engaged with your body, heart pumping, blood flowing.
5 Components to a Power Hour
1. Exercise & Energize
One step at a time to achieve the change you want in your life and to obtain mastery with where you are, a little stronger each day.
2. Gratitude
Breath Deep. Gratitude is the key to happiness. List what you are grateful for. Allow the sense of gratitude to flow through you. List things that you are thankful for outward now. Deep breath in.
3. Connect with God
You are not alone. God wants you to succeed. He wants to give you everything you want. You just have to ask for it.
Help me to: learn, overcome, give me the strength and courage, to say, to do, to work, have a vision, to stay true, to grow, be authentic, open, to serve, to love, remember the truth, have the power, stand, be bold, be an example, be a friend or lover, help me to heal, be courageous, lead me, help me be humble, etc.
Feel the infinite divine connection with being a Son/Daughter of God.
4. Affirmations
Remind myself of things I know. Achieve and choose success. Breath in. Breath out. Focus on your breath.
Breath Out: Frustrations, fears, doubt, worry, limits, challenges that stop me, the lies, the negative thoughts.
Breath In: love, power, hope, trust, energy, strength, peace, joy, calm, courage. Stand clear and strong. Lead with vision and power.
I am a source of...
I am confident and powerful...
My love...
Everyday I seek to grow and be a communicator and learner. God bless me so that I can bless others. I have one life to live and I chose to LiveBIG!
Create new neuropathways through recorded affirmations to reinforce these.
5. Reconnect with Your Vision and Direction You are headed
What are your dreams? Who do you want to become? Imagine that you already have them. Allow your mind to experience them. The excitement, gratitude, what to do. See yourself as that person. You will see 1 or 2 things today...take cation to where you want to be. Feel it as it is already yours. See the opportunity it makes you have, feel, be, do. Look at what you need to do to create that abundance in your life. See yourself taking these actions. Experience what it is to live like this. This is who you are!!! This is the decision you need to make to live today. This is reality. This is who you are.
Exercise:
The greatness I see in you...
Gerald Rogers
Have a purposeful living. There will be unlimited excuses to keep you from living your choice. Its your choice. Use these tools on purpose. IT will create more power and energy. Are you worth it? Live on purpose. How do you live that?
Anthony Fowler
Align your conscious beliefs with your conscious desires. Fight with your conscious and unconscious parts of your brain. comfort Zones aren't very comfortable but they are familiar.
What do you want? What's holding you back? Figure out the lies you have believed your whole life. Delete the file. Just like everything else you begin to do the things to achieve these goals.
Diagram of a Familiar Zone
We are all seeking meaning. Create meaning. We have events that make our story which creates meaning and our B.S. (Behavior Systems aka Bull Shit).
If you want to be good at something you must SUCK at it first. Most of us don't want to suck. We then ask questions? Our grain is trained to answer our questions. If you ask crappy questions you get crappy answers.
By Age 8 we now become self aware. What matches with what doesn't match. The moment a belief is formed, the scale tips. You have a small delay in your brain. When you experience fear or excitement, the feelings are the same, except the meaning you give it. It's a choice. You can assign a new meaning. Two ways to do this: Repetition or Intensity. Disbelief triggers continue to be validated. When you boil any energy down it is light. Find the belief where it started. Punch through your filter to change your belief. You will find a lot of them. You can only achieve and attend to one at a time.
Your neuropaths are frayed wires with splits going different ways. When you clear the pathways, they disconnect. Then you can never go there again. Psychi is mind energy. Your body is one giant cohesive unit.
Gerald Rogers
Every story in my life is divine to orchestrate the things God has for me in my life. Live more fully and be the person you were created to be. All the things that have happened in your life are for a reason.
You are great...
You are amazing...
You are inspiring...
Feed yourself who you are. It's your choice to be that leader. To be that friend. I honor and respect who you are. I give you permission to be in your junk.
You attract the energy vibrations that you are, you want, you desire.
I don't need to be around those people who want to take me down. Release them. Block them. Focus on what you want to create.
Surround yourself with like minded people. Build your tribe.
Soul Purpose:
Our purpose is something we chose. It also chooses us. Everyday there are clues. I chose to live my purpose today. When you are living on purpose you have clarity of mind. When you live your purpose it all comes naturally. It's way more fulfilling. IT takes energy but it also energizes. One form of work puts out but one takes in and out.
Questions to ask:
What are the clues around you?
Where do you spend your time?
What do you enjoy (InJoy) doing?
What are my talents?
What are you excited about?
What is the feedback you are getting?
What advice do people ask me for?
What is giving you resistance?
What are the challenges that I have faced?
What do I want to learn about?
What do I get intrigued by?
What do I like to educate myself on?
What is your internal resistance?
What are your/the distraction preventing you?
What gives you enthusiasm?
What do you want to serve?
Would you do this if you didn't get paid?
What are the problems I want to solve?
Are you willing to learn?
I am willing to do the work but I want God to direct me. Start walking down the path. Anything you try to do that you have never done before will create fear. Test the fear. Test the feelings. Listen to the nudges. It isn't easy. We signed up for the path of greatest growth and fun. What causes you to grow? On this path of learning?
Entheuo = Living In & With God
It's defined by what brings me JOY and how I can SERVE others...and let's you grow/create growth. When in alignment with this you are living your soul purpose.
Exercise:
What are the clues to if I am living my life purpose?
How do you live this on purpose? How does it show up in your daily life? What is one simple action I can take every day? Create momentum and take ONE small action. The results compound themselves. How can I be 1% better today? Erase your challenges.
Share it with others. Ask for help. You need someone who is great where you are weak.
The only thing that stands between you and your dreams are the conversations you aren't willing to have.
It doesn't matter where you work but how you work. You are solving problems for others. Help them make their/your life better. You can do this and make money. Business is solving problems for profit. Create and don't settle. Chose what you want to learn and pursue that. Take full accountability with learning. The real game of life is learning how to live life...well...and to learn how to learn. Sales is nothing more than leading them to what they want. Sales is something each of us do.
Marketing. Sales. System. Live in the space of certainty.
What is your why that drives you? Why is it worthy? If your why is strong enough, you can overcome anything. Why is that important to you? I want to be/see a man/woman who lives and talks what he/she believes. What is your why? What is going to motivate you to push through?
Video: 212*
1* separates the good from the great. It's your life. Attitude. Kindness. Belief. Focus. Perseverance.
What will push you another degree? If your dreams are important to you, you need to have a support system. Have the accountability to take you through with the tools to live your dreams, to move forward. Less than 5% of people will.
The Mindset creates The Skillset
All your goals and achievements come from clarity...build new patterns...create a new subconscious belief(s). Release the scarcity...gain unlimited confidence. Rewrite your story.
Video: Why do we need coaches?
Your attitude is just like your heart. Keep moving. Give your very best. Don't quit. It's not too hard. Don't quit on me. If you can walk around defeated so will we. Count me in.
On a scale of 1 to 10, are you committed to getting results? If you are committed, at a level 10...you will find a way to be resourceful. How committed are you? Until one is committed, there is hesitancy to hold back.
Tony Litster
Two Things:
1. Better Story
2. Create in alignment with Natural Law
Video: Make a Plan, Believe in Yourself, Follow Through
You feel discomfort when its against natural law.
To create Well Being
1. Body
Our total internal processes start in our body. Slow it down. This leads to addiction if kept ramped up. Learn how to turn it all the way on and all the way off. Learn how to feed it. It will regenerate itself. Learn to rest it. Learn to move it. Resistance creates strength.
2. Mind
Eliminate shame. Slow the chatter. Replace it with what you want. Shift your focus. Resistance creates fear. The 4 Patterns of Self Sabotage are very prevalent in our mind. We must be willing to replace.
3. Spirit
Learn to get still. Be still and know that I am God. We get intuition this way.
4. Stress Management
Stress creates a strain on our nervous system. Then we crave adrenaline. We wake up and experience fight of flight encounters. We then face the stresses of the day. We experience a crash...need for more caffeine. We rush home very exhausted from our day. When then want more adrenaline. You need activity and then rest. Sleep. Meditation. This releases the stress on the nervous system. Choose to effective reduce your stress or continue your addiction.
We have a tendency to over complicate things. It has to be simple. Something you can do consistently every day...even on your worst day.
Affirmations to refocus and reinforce the statements.
At each meditation, approach as a new experience for the first time. No distractions. Don't make it wrong. Let it happen as it happens. You are unlocking what's in your brain. Don't do it for hours and hours...we can't handle it, the results from what we learn. It allows us to listen to the chaos and noise.
Meditation Process:
Close your eyes. Take a few breaths. Whatever is going on in your mind will come out. Don't make it perfect. It's not wrong. Effortlessly switch your focus. Don't fight just bring yourself back. Your brain knows what to do with this.
The Art of Surrender: Want it to go away? Don't care if it does.
You will develop more space when you slow down. When you give yourself something to think about you release the other clutter going on in your mind.
Brain Change:
30 Days to develop a new Neural Pathway
90 Days to develop a new Primary Pathway
Your plan has to be in alignment with these.
Water, Weed, Repeat
reinforce to change faster and let go of what you can't control and keep what you can...purposely create the skills
The Natural Law of Money = increase the value of what you bring to the table and/or increase quantity (the law of exchange)
Video: It's not about the Nail
Gerald Rogers
What does it mean to LiveBIG? Live life on your own terms. Why do you struggle? Look at your internal blocks and beliefs to let you live BIG?!!!
Cleanse and let go...live your purpose. Receive confirmation to accept yourself and let go of your fears, junk and beliefs. You get to choose to rewrite your story! Be Brave and Be Courageous to live in your body, mind and spirit.
Your entire life is the ability to be a conscious creator. What will stop you? Fear. A core fear of judgement, rejection, shame, etc. This causes you to show up really shy. Think about how your fears come up to sabotage you. What is your rejection triggers? What do they mean? Are you willing to fear and do something anyways? What is the fear that has been sabotaging you?
Exercise with an Arrow
The arrow is the metaphor of the fears that are holding you back. How has this fear held you back?
Saturday, January 25, 2014
LiveBIG Coaches: Tony & Gerald
My Coaches at #LiveBIG!!! An incredible 3 Day experience...
This event will help you delve into your junk, discover your lies, teach you how to replace them with truth, how to remove your barriers, understand who you are, find your passion, as you are taught to learn to be a creator daily in your life and given the tools to rewrite your story.
I am still working on all my nuggets and takeaways that I want to share with you from this experience to inspire you to be courageous, remove your barriers, rewrite your story and LiveBIG!
This event will help you delve into your junk, discover your lies, teach you how to replace them with truth, how to remove your barriers, understand who you are, find your passion, as you are taught to learn to be a creator daily in your life and given the tools to rewrite your story.
I am still working on all my nuggets and takeaways that I want to share with you from this experience to inspire you to be courageous, remove your barriers, rewrite your story and LiveBIG!
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| LtoR: Tony Litster, Me, Gerald Rogers |
Friday, January 24, 2014
Day 24 Writing Goals
Day 24: Blog writing = 2,542 words. Book writing = 0 words.
#my500words challenge with @JeffGoins #2014Goals
#my500words challenge with @JeffGoins #2014Goals
Day 2 of LiveBIG reflections
2nd Day of Conference is over. 13 hours {two 90 min breaks}. 15 pages of notes.
Top 3 Nuggets:
#1 You will forget who you are. You will have to remind yourself. Live in alignment in the truth.
#2 Everything exists out of fear or love. Everything shows up in your inner self worth. What message are you telling the world? You will never lose love if you love yourself.
#3 The automatic 4 patterns we sabotage ourselves through: Core Emotional Self Image, Inner Dialogue, Fears and Additions.
Thankful for my buddy partner, Brandee Thornton Burt! I couldn't have picked a more loving, supportive, like minded person to be my accountability partner. her!
My I am Statement: I Am a Courageous, Generous, Loving Woman.
#LiveBIG with Gerald Rogers and Tony Litster
Top 3 Nuggets:
#1 You will forget who you are. You will have to remind yourself. Live in alignment in the truth.
#2 Everything exists out of fear or love. Everything shows up in your inner self worth. What message are you telling the world? You will never lose love if you love yourself.
#3 The automatic 4 patterns we sabotage ourselves through: Core Emotional Self Image, Inner Dialogue, Fears and Additions.
Thankful for my buddy partner, Brandee Thornton Burt! I couldn't have picked a more loving, supportive, like minded person to be my accountability partner. her!
My I am Statement: I Am a Courageous, Generous, Loving Woman.
#LiveBIG with Gerald Rogers and Tony Litster
My Journal Nuggets from Day 2 of LiveBIG
Gerald Rogers
Be still. We spend too much time rushing. It's all a mirage to create more...to do more...to be more.
You are love. You are peace. You are enough. You are joy. You are gratitude. Be in the peace of this stillness, in this moment, fully present. When you are fully present there is no stress, lack, fear, need for more. Only peace, love, happiness. This gift is always available to you but can't be found by tracing the mirage. Have full gratitude for the gift of the present. Be content with what you have. Rejoice in the way things are. When you realize nothing is lacking...the world belongs to you.
You have everything you need to be whole. You are not broken. The space of pure gratitude (not of fear or lack or not good enough) is success.
I am a Miracle. Powerful. Unlimited. Joyful. Creative. Joy. Abundance. Possibility. Excitement. Gratitude. Passion of your Sacred Self.
Live in alignment with the truth. You will forget who you are. You will have to remind yourself. Don't get frustrated with yourself. Remind yourself create your tools to reprogram yourself. Have courage to be open, authentic, loving.
Marci Lock
The power is in the present moment right now. How do I move thru?
There is no judgement in attachment. I am who I am. If I live out anything else then who I am, I am living a mask which is a slap in the face to God.
You are perfect now. You have everything in you. You get to create, pursue, believe what you deserve. You can't be forced. You have to chose. If you want to experience life is hard, you can. If you want to be awesome, you can. You get to chose what you think about yourself.
Tools: You are perfect. Everything exists out of Fear or Love. Love creates everything. Fear creates limit and more fear.
Fear = False Evidence Appearing Real
What if you learn to love everything you were taught to fear?
Everything is just feedback. Whatever you think and believe you can achieve. You will feel what you tell yourself. Whatever you think or focus on you will experience. What do I want to experience? The fit of feedback helps you figure out what is working or not working to create improvement. I am the creator. What works? Chose not to live in this story. Take ownership.
It starts with a Thought. Thought leads to Emotion. Emotion leads to Perceptions/Behaviors. Perceptions/Behaviors leads to Beliefs.
You believe 80% what you tell yourself...and only 20% what someone else tells you about yourself. You either stop yourself or give into the emotion. Pain is an action signal...when you feel fear, defense, a trigger created as a comfort zone. Everything you want is just outside that comfort zone. Listen to your ation signals. When you are feeling only emotions that are not what you want to feel look at your action signal(s). Clarity gives you the perspective to move forward. You are the creator of your life and so when you realize that you have self revelation/self awareness...catch yourself in action to sabotage or a feeling that comes over you...move through it once you analyze.
Action Signal:
1. Awareness Feeling
2. Why?
3. What do I want?
4. Perceive/Believe (NOW by taking action to change)
5. Vibe Changer
Always get around to a solution. Communicate authentically with what is going on. This brings clarity. Take ownership not a blame game which gives more negative feelings. Ask the right questions to find the right solutions (to take action). What just came up for you? Ask for what you want!
Be open to everything, attached to nothing. Be in peace and flow. Create balance. Motion creates emotions.
We are living in the story of someday which really means never.
Everything shows up in your inner self worth. What message are you telling the world? What am I feeling? What do I want to feel? How do I give myself the feeling I want?
The Story you tell yourself...
Love yourself enough. Fill you up. 1st. Be in LOVE with you!!!
Garden Hose Example
Everything is as easy or as hard as you want to make it.
Challenge:
Look in the mirror. Be present. Look yourself in the eyes. You will never lose love if you love yourself. I Love You!
Give yourself success. Look for success (not failure). Celebrate success.
Tony Litster
How do we sabotage ourselves? Why do we self sabotage?
We sabotage ourselves through four patterns that are automatic, not consciously thorught through:
Be still. We spend too much time rushing. It's all a mirage to create more...to do more...to be more.
You are love. You are peace. You are enough. You are joy. You are gratitude. Be in the peace of this stillness, in this moment, fully present. When you are fully present there is no stress, lack, fear, need for more. Only peace, love, happiness. This gift is always available to you but can't be found by tracing the mirage. Have full gratitude for the gift of the present. Be content with what you have. Rejoice in the way things are. When you realize nothing is lacking...the world belongs to you.
You have everything you need to be whole. You are not broken. The space of pure gratitude (not of fear or lack or not good enough) is success.
I am a Miracle. Powerful. Unlimited. Joyful. Creative. Joy. Abundance. Possibility. Excitement. Gratitude. Passion of your Sacred Self.
Live in alignment with the truth. You will forget who you are. You will have to remind yourself. Don't get frustrated with yourself. Remind yourself create your tools to reprogram yourself. Have courage to be open, authentic, loving.
Marci Lock
The power is in the present moment right now. How do I move thru?
There is no judgement in attachment. I am who I am. If I live out anything else then who I am, I am living a mask which is a slap in the face to God.
You are perfect now. You have everything in you. You get to create, pursue, believe what you deserve. You can't be forced. You have to chose. If you want to experience life is hard, you can. If you want to be awesome, you can. You get to chose what you think about yourself.
Tools: You are perfect. Everything exists out of Fear or Love. Love creates everything. Fear creates limit and more fear.
Fear = False Evidence Appearing Real
What if you learn to love everything you were taught to fear?
Everything is just feedback. Whatever you think and believe you can achieve. You will feel what you tell yourself. Whatever you think or focus on you will experience. What do I want to experience? The fit of feedback helps you figure out what is working or not working to create improvement. I am the creator. What works? Chose not to live in this story. Take ownership.
It starts with a Thought. Thought leads to Emotion. Emotion leads to Perceptions/Behaviors. Perceptions/Behaviors leads to Beliefs.
You believe 80% what you tell yourself...and only 20% what someone else tells you about yourself. You either stop yourself or give into the emotion. Pain is an action signal...when you feel fear, defense, a trigger created as a comfort zone. Everything you want is just outside that comfort zone. Listen to your ation signals. When you are feeling only emotions that are not what you want to feel look at your action signal(s). Clarity gives you the perspective to move forward. You are the creator of your life and so when you realize that you have self revelation/self awareness...catch yourself in action to sabotage or a feeling that comes over you...move through it once you analyze.
Action Signal:
1. Awareness Feeling
2. Why?
3. What do I want?
4. Perceive/Believe (NOW by taking action to change)
5. Vibe Changer
Always get around to a solution. Communicate authentically with what is going on. This brings clarity. Take ownership not a blame game which gives more negative feelings. Ask the right questions to find the right solutions (to take action). What just came up for you? Ask for what you want!
Be open to everything, attached to nothing. Be in peace and flow. Create balance. Motion creates emotions.
We are living in the story of someday which really means never.
Everything shows up in your inner self worth. What message are you telling the world? What am I feeling? What do I want to feel? How do I give myself the feeling I want?
The Story you tell yourself...
Love yourself enough. Fill you up. 1st. Be in LOVE with you!!!
Garden Hose Example
Everything is as easy or as hard as you want to make it.
Challenge:
Look in the mirror. Be present. Look yourself in the eyes. You will never lose love if you love yourself. I Love You!
Give yourself success. Look for success (not failure). Celebrate success.
Tony Litster
How do we sabotage ourselves? Why do we self sabotage?
We sabotage ourselves through four patterns that are automatic, not consciously thorught through:
- Core Emotional Self Image
- Inner Dialogue
- Fears
- Addictions
These create triggers based on emotions that dig you deeper into your fears that make you hide and want to escape. Unexamined patterns will run us...when these moments happen at your worst, you can do it at your worst.
Go to a place of self acceptance. I Love and Accept Myself. Examine without shame. What do I want? Create steps for new fruit. Do you let the cycle run itself out of control like a whirlwind or do you let it move you? Don't rationalize it. Create connectedness with your crap. Know this is your pattern. Got back to focusing on creating new patterns. Create affirmations.
{I asked Tony a question about how do you examine without shame. I will share more about this in my personal journey at LiveBIG.}
Gerald Rogers
None of this matters if you don't lay a new foundation. Instill new results. It will be hard because you have all these past experiences. You will get results. Your mind is fighting to make your story true. You achieve your goals all the time.
Be a conscious creator. A divine authentic self. Live your purpose. Be. See. Live.
Things you don't want to happen in your life...happen. :)
Video: Escalator
At some point in your life you were trained to be a reactor. That's why we get stuck. It affects you in every aspect of your life. Be aware of how you are showing up. The more you are aware, the more energy and power you will have. There is no power in being a victim.
Your outer results will be a reflection of your interior beliefs. You will create the reality. Beliefs lead to Reality.
In seasons of change the learners will inherit the earth. While the learned will find themselves beautifully equipped to deal with a world that no longer exists.
Have stories and beliefs that support you. The perfection of imperfection. In the mess we find meaning. In meaning we find happiness. Create your journey. Have a vision of what's possible.
What do you want? Dream.
Exercise:
Create a list of what I want.
One one side put the reason. On the other put the antidote.
You can have reasons or results but you can't have both!
Its Your Story!!!
Exercise:
Create a list of reasons why I can't have this.
There are default ways of seeing or believing. These are created by the time you are 5 years old. Ever if the pathway is leading to a destination I don't want, its still a pattern. See a possibility to visit a new place. Your mind will always be drawn t what you know. Be conscious about creating, believing, and focusing on your new path. You have a whole list of excuses or reasons to validate your lies. Challenge your lies. What is the truth that will empower me? Find the belief that works for you.
Exercise:
What is the truth?
When you align yourself to truth you create power. Own the truth. You are a powerful creator. Create an antidote. Just ask is that really true? Challenge it.
Gerald Rogers
We listen through faulty filters...our own limiting beliefs. This means you can't hear clearly the empowering belief. We all have rules in our lives when this happens...then I am happy. Those rules create a barrier for our happiness. What rules have you created that aren't working in your life? What rules are not allowing you to feel and be loved? Create new powerful beliefs.
Tony Litster
Self Acceptance is the first step to be a pivotal game changer. We then see the fruits we want. If you want the harvest you have to do the work...you get to try again next years harvest.
Two Options:
Conditional Acceptance = once I get my stuff together I can be okay with me
Total Acceptance = I have rules in place to accept myself as I am now
Well Being is in between these two experiences...is natural law...this is how we get Well Being to be balance. Are you out of alignment with natural law? Anchor in a belief that serves you. Accept yourself because of your worth. Somehow Everyone Xists. (Yes that is how he put it up there because it spells his favorite word). The variables are astonishing. Perfectly timed. We value things because of scarcity. My existence is worth celebrating. I am a miracle. I am a soul that has light and worth.
Marci Lock
Retrain your mind to not see the problem. There is a huge benefit in small changes. Get clear on the beliefs behind the behaviors. Your body is your BEST enemy! Even healthy food can work against you if your body can't absorb it. Understand your body. It is as easy or as hard as you want it to be. What your doing by fighting is hard.
Mind. Body. Abundant Life.
Do not burn muscle. Working out before you eat burns muscle. Supplements are required. Ground should have 90 minerals but currently has 3. Give it what it needs and it will build 66% more muscle. Your Body is worth it...if you believe it. Eat protein in the evening before bed helps build muscle at night. Diets create fat storage. If you can't do it for life you won't continue it. Look at your lifestyle. Sugar is an addiction.
Change from I don't have to, to I get to! When the ego mind is forced it resists. You never have to. Its a choice! If you see more pleasure in change you won't just see the pain and you will be more effective in the change. Most of what we are taught is incorrect or we are not told anything.
Tony & Bri Litster
Muscle burns, tears and rebuilds. Just like our life.
Rules of Relationships by modeling (parents, MTV, ChickFlix, Disney, Porn, Religion, Friends, Media) = zero...fantasy...a delusion. How many people have a true loving and meaningful relationship? The average relationship thrives for 18 months.
You need skills. You have to study the skills.
Guys think about sex every 7 seconds...woman every 3-4 days.
Wounded. Abused. Physical Affection can cause someone to fear.
What was your contribution to the situation? Have your head in the game. It takes both people to work on the relationship. Do the work now. You will trigger each other...its painful to change.
Relationship Tools:
Fight Fair - one person takes the blame to get the other one to shut up (don't do this)...say I know you didn't mean to hurt me. Set your boundary and do not let the violation happen. You fight about things that weren't even the reason for the fight. Use your diffusing technique: diffuse the energy and separate yourself from the fight. Validate them for being upset but ask to discuss rationally. When you feel you are being attacked, you have to pull back. The other person is not your enemy even if they are triggering something.
Woman were created to be selective with who they mated with. They might not be able to support themselves. Woman are designed to say no. To engage a woman you need to let her talk about what is going on in her world. She doesn't want you to fix it. Guys stay away from the bulls eye. Stimulate her mind. Pick a time when she can unwind. The touch needs to be gentle...a comforting touch. Then pull away. It will create desire. Be alluring and attracting. Tease if there is a reward. Tease & Please.
Allow your man to be your man. Make him feel he is the super studdish man.
Don't create a feeling that you want something. You need her to emerge as a flower. Honor her. Create safety. You can influence the romance of your relationship.
We each have our crap. When injured or hurt, it will send you back to your camp. Elaborate on your feelings. What did it say about you? I need you to never, never, never... I need you to always, always, always... Repeat back what they are thinking to validate their feelings. Both people are triggered when they communicate. If you can't honor the request, let them know and ask for something else.
Relationships are not perfect. We can't always get them to do what we need them to do. This allows you to get to that child that needs to be healed. It helps understand why. This allows you to grow. You can't let someone love you when you don't love yourself and don't believe God loves you.
Gerald Rogers
Be easy to follow. It's easy to be a follower. Create momentum. Nurture your 1st followers. There is no movement without that 1st follower. Show others how to follow. Have the guts to stand up and dive in. Each of you are a leader.
You are a child of God. You were born to shine as children do. Living small does not do you a favor. Your example liberates those around.
Exercise:
I am a powerful creator.
Prayer for Day 2 of LiveBIG
Dear Lord,
You know each of us deeply, the journey each of us are on, what we have experienced, how our belief systems were created, why we are stuck and what it is going to take to move us past these walls that are holding us back. Give us courage, wisdom, strength and focus to move through this intense process with Gerald Rogers and his team. Help us to not lose heart or hold back, to not have fear. Give them the skills to assist us to dig deep, to reflect, to use this powerful event to move through the barriers. Guide and direct them today. Give them insight, patience, and love. May we be forever grateful for this opportunity to #LiveBig!!!!!!!
In your loving name I pray. AMEN!
You know each of us deeply, the journey each of us are on, what we have experienced, how our belief systems were created, why we are stuck and what it is going to take to move us past these walls that are holding us back. Give us courage, wisdom, strength and focus to move through this intense process with Gerald Rogers and his team. Help us to not lose heart or hold back, to not have fear. Give them the skills to assist us to dig deep, to reflect, to use this powerful event to move through the barriers. Guide and direct them today. Give them insight, patience, and love. May we be forever grateful for this opportunity to #LiveBig!!!!!!!
In your loving name I pray. AMEN!
Thursday, January 23, 2014
Day 23 Writing Goals
Day 23: Blog writing = 3,664 words. Book writing = 0 words.
#my500words challenge with @JeffGoins #2014Goals
#my500words challenge with @JeffGoins #2014Goals
Day 1 of LiveBIG reflections
1st Day of Conference is over.
10 hours {two 90 min breaks}.
12 pages of notes.
Top 3 Nuggets:
#1 release those things back to the person who gave them to you {this was a dynamic link for me beyond previous work done in letting go concepts}
#2 look at the results you are getting that you don't like, trace back the emotions to uncover your "beliefs" in whats holding you back so that you can change them.
#3 you have a choice: You can believe I am not good enough or you can believe I am good enough. The choice is yours.
#LiveBIG with Gerald Rogers and Tony Litster
10 hours {two 90 min breaks}.
12 pages of notes.
Top 3 Nuggets:
#1 release those things back to the person who gave them to you {this was a dynamic link for me beyond previous work done in letting go concepts}
#2 look at the results you are getting that you don't like, trace back the emotions to uncover your "beliefs" in whats holding you back so that you can change them.
#3 you have a choice: You can believe I am not good enough or you can believe I am good enough. The choice is yours.
My I am Statement: I Am a Courageous, Generous, Loving Woman.
#LiveBIG with Gerald Rogers and Tony Litster
My Journal Nuggets from Day 1 of LiveBIG
I am attending LiveBIG in Salt Lake City, Utah (technically in Sandy, Utah, about 30 minutes from the SLC AIrport). I will be doing some personal blog posting, but today's post is simply to share with you the nuggets from this event.
The music playing as we walked into the event was the song: This is your Life, are you who you want to be?
Gerald Rogers
Ask yourself tough questions. Meaningful questions. What is my purpose? What is possible with my life? What does it mean to LiveBIG?
Be passionate. Meaningful. Purpose Driven Life.
What do you want to experience? What are you willing to do to make that happen? Are you willing to let go of what's limiting you?
You have a special calling. Be the best you can be.
Sometimes its a scary moment to let go. To have courage. To ask questions. To test your wings. To soar.
Play a Level 10. How you play the game here is how you play out there! Get outside your comfort zone. Engage. What you get out of it is what you put into it.
Repetition is the mother of all learning.
Rewrite the stories of your life.
First question for the day to Journal:
Leverage the lessons learned from your past. Be in love with you. Treat it with respect. How do you live each day? Is it within this focus of living big?
Your life is a Blank White Canvas...How do you want your life to look? Trust and know the answers will come. This is worth investing in.
Second question for the day to Journal:
We matched up with a partner. We had to share with them what living big looked like for us. They shared with us. We had to look into their eyes for a full minute. Then we had to tell them what we saw:
LIES = limits. TRUTH = free.
Lies are stories we tell ourselves about who we are. Step more fully into the truth...the truth will empower you. Be in alignment with truth and confidence in the outcome. Be reminded and reintroduced into truth each day while you are here.
An introduction into each of the team, what they do, who they are, why they are here and what they want for us out of this event. The theme: You get to be who you are truly are by forgetting about who you were told you were. We want you to experience full love and greatness. Not pain. Frustration. Doubt. Fear. Limits.
A review of the rules during these 3 days.
Be committed to your commitment. So you can have order. Life does happen and we have to make choices. Are they more important than your commitments? Be in integrity with your commitments. Results happen because of your commitments. Trust your own word because you know you will follow through.
Commit at 100% or 0%. Either commit all or nothing. All is YES, completely, fully. Nothing is NO, and is okay. It is okay to say NO.
Question: Why do we feel we can't say no. {There is a lot of engagement with the audience. I chose to answer this question which made me be chosen as the spotlight for the next part of this session, about 15 minutes. I will do a whole post on this later.}
We all have had experiences. Many of them are neutral experiences but when we give them meaning they create a definition we give them. Each person has their own experiences then create for them meaning, and their own definitions that they have attributed to these experiences. Not everyone has the same experience, meaning or definition to the same statement or experience.
End of the Morning Session Challenge: Ask someone what it means to LiveBIG!
Return to begin the Afternoon Session:
Reviewed the question asked to people when we went to have lunch as to what does it mean to them to LiveBIG.
Discussed that we all need buddies, what are the attributes of buddies, what we need or want from a buddy, how to be a buddy, and they had us pick a buddy. Girls with girls. Guys with guys.
We then were asked questions that our buddy answered so we could learn more about them. We then were asked questions so that our buddy could learn about us. And of course, they touched on everything!
Marci Lock
Why am I stuck?
You are powerful beyond measure. What we know we are is based on what we have been told and experienced.
Experience = Decisions/Beliefs = Identity = Patterns/Behaviors = Results
All you want is to be loved. Peace. Freedom.
The story that you are living is what you believe about yourself. You carry out your actions by what you believe. Internal World = Outer World. Your actions will validate your feelings/internal beliefs.
Remember who you truly are. Create that image. Whatever you are looking for you will find. Everything I am experiencing is my choice.
1. Attract
2. Interpret
3. Act Out
You eventually sabotage it if you don't believe it is good enough. Allow yourself to live in different beliefs/belief systems. Triggers will create you to carry out your interpretations.
From your roots you get your fruit. Your results don't lie. What do I want? What do I want to be? Plant a new see to create a new tree to create awesome fruit.
We see failure and quit. Forget who you were told to be. Forget who you think you are. Be who you believe you are.
Third question of the day to Journal:
Become conscious of your words, your feelings, your thoughts, your actions. Why do I feel what I am feeling? What is the action to create what I want? What will that give me? What do I want? Is it true?
Be okay with you. Let it be a mirror for you. Don't be attached. Look at the root cause and clear it.
Rework your web...cut your strings. Rewire your subconscious. Don't just get it intellectually. Don't live in a mask. Don't avoid the pain. Look at the resistance. Find yourself. Create new patterns and beliefs with what you want. Believe it. Fight the voice {the voice in your head}.
Fourth question of the day to Journal:
Bri Litster
Everyone has breakers you have to break through to get to the point that you can glide the waves. Emotions are supposed to teach us...be willing to go through the pain to get the joy.
Be a positive force. Negative never equals positive. You can't avoid negative experiences or trauma. But you still have a choice. They influence how we see the world and ourselves and how we interact with the world. Make a choice about what we will do with the trauma because its who we believe we are.
When trauma happens, you go into survival mode. You just exist. Trauma produces victims or victors. Trauma is an event that you can't escape from. Own it. Quit reacting. Have courage to go through the fire. Emotion is tied to our trauma. You have to step back and deal with the negative emotion. Feel it. Release it. Let it go. The emotion will lead you to discover it. Stop and listen to what you need. Don't let the emotions pull you under. Don't let it own you. See the beauty in who you are. It doesn't have to be perfect. You are perfect NOW. Change your definition of perfect.
You are more than what happened to you! God doesn't make junk.
Tony Litster
Stuff that happened will show up again. If unexamined we will sabotage everything. Choose between being right vs successful. There is a difference.
You have another chance every day to try again.
Learn how to process it so it doesn't ruin your life. The right might be bumpy.
Fifth question of the day to Journal:
That's a lie. It never ends. The need to validate yourself. The expectation that everyone has their **** together is impossible. Nobody has it all together. These are impossible games. If I chose in {to these lies} then I can choose out {of these lies}.
You have two choices: You are or you are not enough!
Create a story you can win. Create a game you can win.
We then had an exercise with our eyes closed to take us to a safe place, relax, explore our beliefs, to not carry the old stuff anymore, answer who are you, change your story, develop a vision and to reinforce it so it becomes who you are.
Gerald Rogers
The purpose of today is for you to figure out who you are. you have the capacity to be a different personality depending on the circumstances you are presented and living in.
We did a Soul Script Personality Test. We then interacted in the 4 groups and learned more about ourselves and others.
Sixth question of the day to Journal:
The music playing as we walked into the event was the song: This is your Life, are you who you want to be?
Gerald Rogers
Ask yourself tough questions. Meaningful questions. What is my purpose? What is possible with my life? What does it mean to LiveBIG?
Be passionate. Meaningful. Purpose Driven Life.
What do you want to experience? What are you willing to do to make that happen? Are you willing to let go of what's limiting you?
You have a special calling. Be the best you can be.
Sometimes its a scary moment to let go. To have courage. To ask questions. To test your wings. To soar.
Play a Level 10. How you play the game here is how you play out there! Get outside your comfort zone. Engage. What you get out of it is what you put into it.
Repetition is the mother of all learning.
Rewrite the stories of your life.
First question for the day to Journal:
"What does it mean to LiveBIG?"{I will do my answers at a later date.}
Leverage the lessons learned from your past. Be in love with you. Treat it with respect. How do you live each day? Is it within this focus of living big?
Your life is a Blank White Canvas...How do you want your life to look? Trust and know the answers will come. This is worth investing in.
Second question for the day to Journal:
"How does it look for you to live big emotionally, physically, spiritually?"{Again, I will do my answers at a later date explaining how I want to LiveBIG.}
We matched up with a partner. We had to share with them what living big looked like for us. They shared with us. We had to look into their eyes for a full minute. Then we had to tell them what we saw:
"The greatness I see in you..."See yourself for who you are from the space of your greatness.
LIES = limits. TRUTH = free.
Lies are stories we tell ourselves about who we are. Step more fully into the truth...the truth will empower you. Be in alignment with truth and confidence in the outcome. Be reminded and reintroduced into truth each day while you are here.
An introduction into each of the team, what they do, who they are, why they are here and what they want for us out of this event. The theme: You get to be who you are truly are by forgetting about who you were told you were. We want you to experience full love and greatness. Not pain. Frustration. Doubt. Fear. Limits.
A review of the rules during these 3 days.
Be committed to your commitment. So you can have order. Life does happen and we have to make choices. Are they more important than your commitments? Be in integrity with your commitments. Results happen because of your commitments. Trust your own word because you know you will follow through.
Commit at 100% or 0%. Either commit all or nothing. All is YES, completely, fully. Nothing is NO, and is okay. It is okay to say NO.
Question: Why do we feel we can't say no. {There is a lot of engagement with the audience. I chose to answer this question which made me be chosen as the spotlight for the next part of this session, about 15 minutes. I will do a whole post on this later.}
We all have had experiences. Many of them are neutral experiences but when we give them meaning they create a definition we give them. Each person has their own experiences then create for them meaning, and their own definitions that they have attributed to these experiences. Not everyone has the same experience, meaning or definition to the same statement or experience.
End of the Morning Session Challenge: Ask someone what it means to LiveBIG!
Return to begin the Afternoon Session:
Reviewed the question asked to people when we went to have lunch as to what does it mean to them to LiveBIG.
Discussed that we all need buddies, what are the attributes of buddies, what we need or want from a buddy, how to be a buddy, and they had us pick a buddy. Girls with girls. Guys with guys.
We then were asked questions that our buddy answered so we could learn more about them. We then were asked questions so that our buddy could learn about us. And of course, they touched on everything!
Marci Lock
Why am I stuck?
You are powerful beyond measure. What we know we are is based on what we have been told and experienced.
Experience = Decisions/Beliefs = Identity = Patterns/Behaviors = Results
All you want is to be loved. Peace. Freedom.
The story that you are living is what you believe about yourself. You carry out your actions by what you believe. Internal World = Outer World. Your actions will validate your feelings/internal beliefs.
Remember who you truly are. Create that image. Whatever you are looking for you will find. Everything I am experiencing is my choice.
1. Attract
2. Interpret
3. Act Out
You eventually sabotage it if you don't believe it is good enough. Allow yourself to live in different beliefs/belief systems. Triggers will create you to carry out your interpretations.
From your roots you get your fruit. Your results don't lie. What do I want? What do I want to be? Plant a new see to create a new tree to create awesome fruit.
We see failure and quit. Forget who you were told to be. Forget who you think you are. Be who you believe you are.
Third question of the day to Journal:
"Write a list of your beliefs through your stories, your life, your family/friendships/relationships/people, events."{Again, I will share mine with you later.}
Become conscious of your words, your feelings, your thoughts, your actions. Why do I feel what I am feeling? What is the action to create what I want? What will that give me? What do I want? Is it true?
Be okay with you. Let it be a mirror for you. Don't be attached. Look at the root cause and clear it.
Rework your web...cut your strings. Rewire your subconscious. Don't just get it intellectually. Don't live in a mask. Don't avoid the pain. Look at the resistance. Find yourself. Create new patterns and beliefs with what you want. Believe it. Fight the voice {the voice in your head}.
Fourth question of the day to Journal:
"What results is/are not working in your life?"We then watched a video from Bob Ross about painting on canvas. Here is the video and here are my nuggets from it:
"Paint a lot of good thoughts until its your belief...all you have to is practice...you're the creator...you have freedom on this canvas...believe you can create it...you can do anything you want to do...this is your world...I believe!"
Bri Litster
Everyone has breakers you have to break through to get to the point that you can glide the waves. Emotions are supposed to teach us...be willing to go through the pain to get the joy.
Be a positive force. Negative never equals positive. You can't avoid negative experiences or trauma. But you still have a choice. They influence how we see the world and ourselves and how we interact with the world. Make a choice about what we will do with the trauma because its who we believe we are.
When trauma happens, you go into survival mode. You just exist. Trauma produces victims or victors. Trauma is an event that you can't escape from. Own it. Quit reacting. Have courage to go through the fire. Emotion is tied to our trauma. You have to step back and deal with the negative emotion. Feel it. Release it. Let it go. The emotion will lead you to discover it. Stop and listen to what you need. Don't let the emotions pull you under. Don't let it own you. See the beauty in who you are. It doesn't have to be perfect. You are perfect NOW. Change your definition of perfect.
You are more than what happened to you! God doesn't make junk.
Tony Litster
Stuff that happened will show up again. If unexamined we will sabotage everything. Choose between being right vs successful. There is a difference.
You have another chance every day to try again.
Learn how to process it so it doesn't ruin your life. The right might be bumpy.
Fifth question of the day to Journal:
"If only I was..."
"...then I am OKAY."
That's a lie. It never ends. The need to validate yourself. The expectation that everyone has their **** together is impossible. Nobody has it all together. These are impossible games. If I chose in {to these lies} then I can choose out {of these lies}.
You have two choices: You are or you are not enough!
Create a story you can win. Create a game you can win.
"I do the best I can with what I have and when I mess up, I learn!"When our story changes, we start to see things by our fruits. I am the maker of The Story/My Story. Take a look at your story, is it possible? Does it serve you? Is it an impossible game?
We then had an exercise with our eyes closed to take us to a safe place, relax, explore our beliefs, to not carry the old stuff anymore, answer who are you, change your story, develop a vision and to reinforce it so it becomes who you are.
Gerald Rogers
The purpose of today is for you to figure out who you are. you have the capacity to be a different personality depending on the circumstances you are presented and living in.
We did a Soul Script Personality Test. We then interacted in the 4 groups and learned more about ourselves and others.
Sixth question of the day to Journal:
"Who are you? Create three words that describe yourself and repeat it."
travels to LiveBIG in SLC
Again, I experienced a rough night of sleep. Awake at 5am. Finish packing and head to a clients office. A day packed with conference calls, meetings and training sessions. I worked solidly up until the slotted time I had let my client know I would be leaving (4pm) and was walking down the stairwell at 4.10pm, proud that I was that much on time in light of all I had to still do at 5 minutes to 4pm. {Truly, this was cutting it too close, but its the way I do things because I don't want to disappoint my client, so I push the line and make it crunched for myself.}
Now for the rush to the airport. 15 minutes from the airport, we come to a deadlock. Dead stuck in traffic. I made the quick decision to change my route and go the north side entrance. Probably was not the best decision because 10 minutes down the rode I got stuck in another deadlock.
Park the car. Grab my stuff. Get on the bus to head to the terminal. Print my luggage slip to check my bag hurry off to the airport security check point. Waiting in line, I realize I don't have my boarding pass. Get out of line, head back to the self checkin I used and retrieved it. Back in line, now 10 more people ahead of me. Awwwhhhhhhh, some things just happen like this.
Once through security I hurried to the gate with 30 minutes to spare. No decent food around the gate and I decided I would just grab something when I got to Salt Lake City as it was only a 2.5 hour flight. {Clearly was no thinking about my body and that you don't get food on the plane. Mistake.}
I was flying American Airlines. We had two seats on the left side of the plane and 3 on the right. I was next to an Engineer from Ukraine. When the stewardess came by, I ordered water, a glass of red wine and some hummus and crackers. In doing so, I made a casual comment that I had not anticipated this would be my dinner. He laughed and we started chatting. He was very smart. Showed me pictures of his wife and two kids. Shared with me what he does in his work, how much he travels, how he works with business owners, how he loves to read, follows motivational speakers, love good quotes. He shared these with me:
He then shared what his definition of Success was:
We begin our descent to SLC. After circling for a bit, we are told that we are unable to land due to the weather and we are being rerouted to Las Vegas. We will have to sit on the runway for 2.5 hours and then when cleared, we will return.
The bulk of people on the plane took this really well. The guy, David, I was sitting next to and I laughed about it all. We landed. They fueled us up. We sat about 30 minutes and then were told that we were going to be getting off and into another plane that had equipment that would enable us to land. This is when people got a little bit irritated. How could this plane not have the right equipment to land. Didn't they know what the weather was like in SLC before they left? We joked and said, "What, does the plane not have fog lights?"
We got off the plane. In another 45 minutes or so we boarded and within the hour we were off. It was foggy when we returned to land at SLC Airport. It was 12.45amCST at this point. I was one of 5 people left waiting on luggage that started looking like it wasn't going to show. 15 minutes later it finally did.
Off to get my rental car.
I had booked my travel through Expedia and my reservation was with Advantage. As I approached the counter, I told the lady that I had a reservation. She told me that she had been closed for over 30 minutes. I said I was sorry, but I had a reservation. She then told me, after looking at my paperwork, that I was to have been here hours ago. I said, Yes, I am aware of that however I got here as quickly as I could as our flight was rerouted to Las Vegas due to the weather. She said, don't have an attitude with me. I said, I am sorry, I don't, I am just explaining. She said, do you want me to help you or not? I said, yes please. She said I only have one vehicle left and it is a sport utility vehicle for $51.00 a day before taxes and airport fees. I said, that is not what I reserved or the price in my budget. I had reserved something really cheap for $135.00 total. She then got really sassy at this point and said, do you want it or not miss. At this point, I was ready to cry. No dinner. Beyond exhausted. Fatigue issues setting in and hitting me flat in the face. Not only was I trying my best to deal with the situation and make the best of it, but this lady clearly was having a bad day and trying to make my life living hell. And at the moment, I felt she was doing a dang good job at it. I resented her attitude and decided I didn't want to rent this from her, forget the fact that it would be a gas hog and was over my budget. I figured I could get something else at one of the other places.
Wrong. It was Sundance Festival (still don't know what that is, but a big even and they were out of supply of rental vehicles) and also winter ski season in SLC. I went to Dollar and asked if they could help me. They only had one option, to put me in a mini Susuki car for $48.00 a day. So much for saving money!!! I was now spending $340.00.
My body was screaming at me. I knew I had a 30 minute drive yet even after all this got resolved. I was angry. I was crying out, Why God? Why ME? You know I was just trying to do my best and not take any more time than necessary off work so that I could not lose out on taking care of my clients and yet not get in too late and yet, look what was happening? If you are trying to work all things for my good, Why is this happening to me??? How is this loving?
Yes, my attitude was sour. Really sour. I was beginning to question why I had even come. Why I had bothered. My adrenal fatigue issues taking over any logical thinking. Life clearly was being so difficult that trying to do anything was nearly impossible.
I posted on Facebook:
Dear God. This was not my plan. Please be with me. I need you. Now. Up 21+ Hours. Not sure how I am gonna do this but as always, I will trust you!!!
I hit the highway and used my GPS to head towards my hotel in Sandy, Utah. Approximately 6 minutes from where the conference was to be held. I arrived at 2.30amMT/3.30amCST. I got into my room, hung up my hangup things and crawled in bed, now so utterly tired that sleep didn't want to come. It finally did. I got 3 hours and then I was up having to get ready to head to the conference.
I was feeling sick to my stomach. My body was feverish. My eyes glazed severely glazed, which is what happens when I don't get enough rest and my adrenals are drained. I wasn't hungry. I was tired. Only tired. I decided to get caffeine, another decision that probably wasn't best. It only made the nausea worse.
I arrived at the conference already emotionally spent and it hadn't begun. I truly felt myself going through the motions but my heart not in any of it. I couldn't believe this is how things worked out.
I spent some time in prayer, trying to calm the anxiety I felt. Trying to refocus my life on the things that were important. Trying to remember the thing my Granma Omi would have said - "It's a no control situation, Misty." It was. The things I could have controlled, I didn't. There was no way to undo those now. I needed to glean from it the lessons I needed to learn and make the changes. What were those lessons? Maybe with time I would figure out, but at the moment, my heart was hurting so deeply, I was beyond frustrated.
I posted on Facebook:
I request your continued prayers. My heart is aching. My body depleted. My soul discouraged. My understanding of God today being questioned. I am hurting physically, emotionally, spiritually and mentally...not the way I anticipated arriving to Salt Lake City, Utah for my conference. Trying to understand God's "plans for me".
I am not one who posts much negative stuff and I got lots of response. I got prayers sent via text messages. I got private Facebook messages. I got scriptures to encourage me. I got friends showing me love. It made it slightly more bearable, but not much. I was drained beyond anything I had faced in a long time and my body was screaming at me. Things had gone too far. I was starting the LiveBIG 3 Day Conference in a bad frame of mind and I knew it.
As usual, I pushed through my feelings and went anyways, even after some people encouraged me to stay at the hotel. I obviously couldn't sleep since I woke up so early so I knew there was no used to back out of anything. And I went.
Now for the rush to the airport. 15 minutes from the airport, we come to a deadlock. Dead stuck in traffic. I made the quick decision to change my route and go the north side entrance. Probably was not the best decision because 10 minutes down the rode I got stuck in another deadlock.
Park the car. Grab my stuff. Get on the bus to head to the terminal. Print my luggage slip to check my bag hurry off to the airport security check point. Waiting in line, I realize I don't have my boarding pass. Get out of line, head back to the self checkin I used and retrieved it. Back in line, now 10 more people ahead of me. Awwwhhhhhhh, some things just happen like this.
Once through security I hurried to the gate with 30 minutes to spare. No decent food around the gate and I decided I would just grab something when I got to Salt Lake City as it was only a 2.5 hour flight. {Clearly was no thinking about my body and that you don't get food on the plane. Mistake.}
I was flying American Airlines. We had two seats on the left side of the plane and 3 on the right. I was next to an Engineer from Ukraine. When the stewardess came by, I ordered water, a glass of red wine and some hummus and crackers. In doing so, I made a casual comment that I had not anticipated this would be my dinner. He laughed and we started chatting. He was very smart. Showed me pictures of his wife and two kids. Shared with me what he does in his work, how much he travels, how he works with business owners, how he loves to read, follows motivational speakers, love good quotes. He shared these with me:
Be All InWe discussed what it meant to be all in. It was interesting.
He then shared what his definition of Success was:
Success = enthusiasm, determination, commitment, and passionHe then asked what I was going to Salt Lake City for. I explained. He then said to me, you seem to already have your act together and that you don't need this. I told him that I didn't see it that way. I explained that if you don't grow yourself, you can't grow your business. He agreed but said that by the level of self help I already was doing he wouldn't agree that I needed to spend $597 on a conference. I didn't argue further. Even though we shared some common connection in thoughts on training employees and business, we obviously had some differences. I wasn't here to convince him. It didn't matter what he thought I did or didn't need. I was going to grow me.
We begin our descent to SLC. After circling for a bit, we are told that we are unable to land due to the weather and we are being rerouted to Las Vegas. We will have to sit on the runway for 2.5 hours and then when cleared, we will return.
The bulk of people on the plane took this really well. The guy, David, I was sitting next to and I laughed about it all. We landed. They fueled us up. We sat about 30 minutes and then were told that we were going to be getting off and into another plane that had equipment that would enable us to land. This is when people got a little bit irritated. How could this plane not have the right equipment to land. Didn't they know what the weather was like in SLC before they left? We joked and said, "What, does the plane not have fog lights?"
We got off the plane. In another 45 minutes or so we boarded and within the hour we were off. It was foggy when we returned to land at SLC Airport. It was 12.45amCST at this point. I was one of 5 people left waiting on luggage that started looking like it wasn't going to show. 15 minutes later it finally did.
Off to get my rental car.
I had booked my travel through Expedia and my reservation was with Advantage. As I approached the counter, I told the lady that I had a reservation. She told me that she had been closed for over 30 minutes. I said I was sorry, but I had a reservation. She then told me, after looking at my paperwork, that I was to have been here hours ago. I said, Yes, I am aware of that however I got here as quickly as I could as our flight was rerouted to Las Vegas due to the weather. She said, don't have an attitude with me. I said, I am sorry, I don't, I am just explaining. She said, do you want me to help you or not? I said, yes please. She said I only have one vehicle left and it is a sport utility vehicle for $51.00 a day before taxes and airport fees. I said, that is not what I reserved or the price in my budget. I had reserved something really cheap for $135.00 total. She then got really sassy at this point and said, do you want it or not miss. At this point, I was ready to cry. No dinner. Beyond exhausted. Fatigue issues setting in and hitting me flat in the face. Not only was I trying my best to deal with the situation and make the best of it, but this lady clearly was having a bad day and trying to make my life living hell. And at the moment, I felt she was doing a dang good job at it. I resented her attitude and decided I didn't want to rent this from her, forget the fact that it would be a gas hog and was over my budget. I figured I could get something else at one of the other places.
Wrong. It was Sundance Festival (still don't know what that is, but a big even and they were out of supply of rental vehicles) and also winter ski season in SLC. I went to Dollar and asked if they could help me. They only had one option, to put me in a mini Susuki car for $48.00 a day. So much for saving money!!! I was now spending $340.00.
My body was screaming at me. I knew I had a 30 minute drive yet even after all this got resolved. I was angry. I was crying out, Why God? Why ME? You know I was just trying to do my best and not take any more time than necessary off work so that I could not lose out on taking care of my clients and yet not get in too late and yet, look what was happening? If you are trying to work all things for my good, Why is this happening to me??? How is this loving?
Yes, my attitude was sour. Really sour. I was beginning to question why I had even come. Why I had bothered. My adrenal fatigue issues taking over any logical thinking. Life clearly was being so difficult that trying to do anything was nearly impossible.
I posted on Facebook:
Dear God. This was not my plan. Please be with me. I need you. Now. Up 21+ Hours. Not sure how I am gonna do this but as always, I will trust you!!!
I hit the highway and used my GPS to head towards my hotel in Sandy, Utah. Approximately 6 minutes from where the conference was to be held. I arrived at 2.30amMT/3.30amCST. I got into my room, hung up my hangup things and crawled in bed, now so utterly tired that sleep didn't want to come. It finally did. I got 3 hours and then I was up having to get ready to head to the conference.
I was feeling sick to my stomach. My body was feverish. My eyes glazed severely glazed, which is what happens when I don't get enough rest and my adrenals are drained. I wasn't hungry. I was tired. Only tired. I decided to get caffeine, another decision that probably wasn't best. It only made the nausea worse.
I arrived at the conference already emotionally spent and it hadn't begun. I truly felt myself going through the motions but my heart not in any of it. I couldn't believe this is how things worked out.
I spent some time in prayer, trying to calm the anxiety I felt. Trying to refocus my life on the things that were important. Trying to remember the thing my Granma Omi would have said - "It's a no control situation, Misty." It was. The things I could have controlled, I didn't. There was no way to undo those now. I needed to glean from it the lessons I needed to learn and make the changes. What were those lessons? Maybe with time I would figure out, but at the moment, my heart was hurting so deeply, I was beyond frustrated.
I posted on Facebook:
I request your continued prayers. My heart is aching. My body depleted. My soul discouraged. My understanding of God today being questioned. I am hurting physically, emotionally, spiritually and mentally...not the way I anticipated arriving to Salt Lake City, Utah for my conference. Trying to understand God's "plans for me".
I am not one who posts much negative stuff and I got lots of response. I got prayers sent via text messages. I got private Facebook messages. I got scriptures to encourage me. I got friends showing me love. It made it slightly more bearable, but not much. I was drained beyond anything I had faced in a long time and my body was screaming at me. Things had gone too far. I was starting the LiveBIG 3 Day Conference in a bad frame of mind and I knew it.
As usual, I pushed through my feelings and went anyways, even after some people encouraged me to stay at the hotel. I obviously couldn't sleep since I woke up so early so I knew there was no used to back out of anything. And I went.
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