an evening with friends

Love to entertain!!! 

Pork Chops, Mashed Potatoes, Mixed Fresh Vegetables, Bacon Wrapped Jalapeños! 

Red Wine. 

Peach Cobbler. 

Awwwhhhhh... — withClark Tarwater and Heather Tarwater.

the plate!...

the beverage of choice tonight...

the dessert...

My aim in Friendship

I aim to be your friend at all times. I desire to always be kind. I completely want to understand you. I honestly want to always love you. But...in my attempt to work through my own struggles, to dissolve all my childhood baggage, to not let my issues come between us, to not let hurts keep me from letting you close, to look at my beliefs and clearly know if they are lies or truth, and ultimately to create a loving space to let you in my world, I sometimes will do it all wrong. I will say things that cause you pain. I will do things that make you question me. I will not understand and it will create conflict.

I only ask that you be patient with me. I ask that you love me when its hard to and you don't want to. I ask that you help me understand what I did wrong. Please don't just cut me out of your life. Please don't just build walls. Please don't treat me coldly. This hurts me. Deeply.

I will always say I am sorry. I will always be open to listening even if I don't see things your way. I will always care about you. Even if it means you are no longer in my world and don't want me in yours. I don't want you to resent me. I don't want you to feel obligated to a friendship/relationship. I release you to be who you need to be.
#MyHeart #PerspectiveOnRelationships #BeLoving

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new intentions

As I return from 10 days away, unplugged from my business, technology (internet, phone, email, texting, Facebook, apps), leaving behind the daily grind of life, away from my "established" friends.....thoroughly getting to experience 5 days on a cruise ship with no routine unless I wanted one, experiencing more firsts (some that weren't on my bucket list...but every first is experienced with enthusiasm), enjoying sunrises and sunsets, food when I was hungry, entertainment when I wanted a good laugh or adventure, the peaceful calm the ocean creates to my soul, the sun rays that warm my heart and body, sleep when I was tired, Yoga each and every morning out on the deck to start my day off in an amazing way, developing a handful of awesome new friendships that have created a bond that I will never forget!!! Then spending 3 days in Florida taking in more time sitting in the sun on a sandy beach letting the ocean and quiet time feed my soul. The time went by quickly and was much needed on so many levels, though I must admit I do not feel it was long enough. Yet God had some amazing things for me to experience and lessons to learn along the way!!! I have memories and experiences I will never forget. I anxiously await the opportunity to create the time to blog about all of these experiences on my personal blog.

As I return to the routine of every day life today, I am implementing a commitment I made prior to my vacation with one of my coaches, to make changes in my business and have set work hours...not just a set number of hours I will work as was the change I made earlier this year. This will be an initial trial run to see how it goes and it will be tweaked as necessary. The changes are necessary for me to create the life I want. I also am even more deeply committed to live more intentionally in my personal life and business. This commitment means that my life will be going through some dramatic changes. I pray that the changes you see in me will continue to inspire you to live with courage, be generous, be loving, and live with all your heart and remember that God will show you the path to take!
#BeCourageous #BeGenerous #BeLoving #CreateTheLifeYouWant

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Stop trying to get noticed by people, you're already approved of by God.

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What makes me powerless is trying to control others. What makes me powerful is learning to manage myself. - Danny Lee Silk

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Give, but don’t allow yourself to be used. Listen to others, but don’t lose your own voice.

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She dances to the songs in her head, speaks with the rhythm of her heart, and loves from the depths of her soul.
 - Dean Jackson

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Until you know that life is war, you cannot know what prayer is for.

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Breaking someone's #trust is like crumpling a perfect piece of paper; you can smooth it over but it's never going to be the same again.

 - Single Matters

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A relationship doesn't need any promises, terms and conditions. It just needs two wonderful people: one who can trust and one who can understand.

 - Single Matters

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If he makes you laugh, kisses your forehead, says he's sorry, makes an effort, holds your hand, works hard, attempts to understand you...then believe it or not, he's quite perfect. 

- Single Matters

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There comes a point where you stop the desperation to be perfect and you just start working towards being better. 
 - Jonathan Dixon

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All human nature vigorously resists grace because grace changes us and the change is painful.
 - Flannery O'Connor

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The truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it.
 - Flannery O'Connor 

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Faith is deliberate confidence in the character of God whose ways you may not understand at the time. 
- Oswald Chambers

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Truth that doesn't set us free isn't truth.
 - Troy Brewer

right or wrong?

In approaching some new dynamics in my life, I have been intentional at stepping back and analyzing what I have believed and why.  I have decided to approach things that I previously was told were right or wrong with the purpose to prove all things.  With the perspective to be objective and not assume that how I was trained and what I know is inherently correct.  To be open to daily being guided in every aspect of/on my courageous journey.

In doing so, I have come to realize very clearly that the way I was raised was to look at everything in life with the filter that it either must be right or it must be wrong.  

Yet as I work through this process of complete authenticity, opening myself up to being willing to see something in a light that I had never seen before, being willing to consider something I had never considered previously, being in a state of mind knowing that God will not lead me wrong if I put all my trust and faith in Him, that He will lead me to find the truth and the answer, for me in the moment, I am finding that as I step back and ask questions, reflect on the facts, analyze the information I have available to me at the time, approach things in this light, fully with an open mind not trying to figure things out on my own, in prayer asking God for complete direction, daily, many times every minute of every hour, to help me understand His plan for my life, to pursue those things that are excellent, and follow my heart and dreams, I have come to see that not everything falls into the category of being right and wrong. 

Sometimes there are decisions that either choice you are presented with would be acceptable or beneficial.  Not every decision is a right or wrong decision. 

This has been a hard adjustment to make. 

I want to make everything a right and wrong decision.  A right and wrong way of living.  A right and wrong motive.  A right and wrong attitude.  A right and wrong belief.

Even if other people have beliefs that my decisions are right or wrong.  Even if others don't see the situation the way I do.  Even if other people wouldn't make the choices I make.  Even if I don't always know if its the right or wrong thing to do or to say.  I can have faith that I am choosing the best in the moment and that even if in the end its not the best thing for me, it will be used in my life to help me in the next moment and decision that comes across my path.   

I know this, in time, hours, days, weeks, months, years, I will know.  In time, I can make additional choices to make the necessary adjustments to tweak my path.  In time, I will have a deeper understanding or perspective as to what is the best thing for me in my life. 

And if I make a decision that isn't the best one, I know this, God is faithful to bring it to a clearer understanding and help me to see the changes that need to happen.  His spirit is so alive that it will be creating life in me!  I also know that God equips us to have a sound mind and to have the ability to make the appropriate decisions when we ask Him for wisdom.  He gives it generously.

Don't doubt that you will know with clarity, completely know, what is right and wrong, for you.

Quotes

Vulnerability is the doorway to connection!
 - Brandon Hawk

Dating Questions: What Do You Want?

I have been asked what do I want in a Man.

What do I want?  I want what every woman wants in a man.  It is not hard.

I want a Man who loves God.  With his whole heart.  

I want a man who strives for excellence in all areas and creates a positive outlook on life.  

I want a man who wants me.  Who will tell me he wants me.  Who will show me that he wants me.  Who is serious about a relationship.  Not just messing around with the idea of having one.  

Who will call me on the phone.  Who wants to hear my voice.  Not just because he has a missed call from me.  

Who will take me out on dates.  Who will make a plan.  Who will take charge when its time to take charge.  

Who will apologize when wrong and make efforts to change.

Who will open the door and treat me like a lady.  

Who doesn't hide me from his family and friends.  

Who will create conversation.  Who will open up and be authentic with me to the same level I am with him.  Who will share his ideas, his dreams and his fears with me.  

Who will get to know me.  Who will pursue me.  Completely.  

Who will invest in me.  Who will let me invest in him.  

Who will tell me what he wants without fear.  Who will listen.  Who will attempt to understand and even when he can't or doesn't, will at least be open to listening anyways.  

Who is clear on his wants, goals, future, and desires in a spouse/relationship.  

Who will be a man, an all around true man.

A man may not be perfect in all these areas.  How he responds to conflict, how he follows through with the things he says he will do, and what he does to establish a relationship and connection with me will tell me whether he is someone that I can be in a relationship with.

The other things are attributes and characteristics that I want in a Man are personal preferences and tastes.  And some of them may or may not be that important.  The important things, are the ones that are the deal breakers and those are the things that I will keep in focus.

This is what I want and this is what I will aim to have.  Nothing less than an excellent relationship focused on growing and loving each other.

What do you want in a Man?  Have you given it thought?  

I am reminded that we get what we pursue and focus on.  Dating is no different.