poem ~ my story

When I share my story
I know it's tough on some of you,
But that's not what 
I ever meant for it to do.

I know the truth of what I've been through
makes it hard to accept and relate,
Yet I know you understand 
living behind a mask increases this fate.

It's not meant to make you feel
guilty for what you didn't know,
Or cause you grief 
for all the love you couldn't show.

I promise you I know the truth now
that you'd of come to my aid,
If you'd ever known the facts
of what went on in this homemade jail cave.

Please don't use the truth against me
even though it's hard for you to know,
Or remotely understand how one 
of your siblings could ever be so cruel.

I lived years deep in fear
that I'd be destroyed if I ever shared,
All the truth of what we experienced
because of the death threats given there.

To share the truth of my childhood 
takes a lot of courage and it should, 
For matters so deep within the heart
intensely hurt when you've been torn apart.

Many times when I share my story
it makes me relive it yet again, 
It's hard to believe this is possible
when so many years have passed since then.

I've chosen to run towards the pain
even when it's uncomfortable, 
Because as exhausting as it is
there's healing in revealing the secret abuse.

Sharing my story with you
is what God wants me to do,
To help others who are stuck
in similar patterns to help them open up.

See I lived years it's true
stuck in fear and deep shame to,
For everything I experienced 
made me feel like I was no longer beautiful.

I've learned the value of being vulnerable 
even when it's hard to do,
For in order to travel this open road
I've got to share how I made it through. 

The process has literally changed my life 
something I never thought it could do,
I pray you'll give me love and grace
even when the truth is hard to take.

I may never be able to makes sense to you
any of the things I've been through,
Yet I promise you even though it's been hard
I love how thoroughly I've been made new.

When you've experienced
a transformation that's this deep,
There are no secrets that you can keep
in this new lifestyle that's so sweet.

I'd love for you to join this journey with me
of living in freedom intentionally, 
But if that's something you can't do
I promise to still love you.

© Misty W Gilbert 
#Poems #AuthorLife #MistyWGilbert #TheSassyVoice #MyStory #TheLifeOfMisty #BeCouragous #BeGenerous #BeLoving #CreateTheLifeYouWant #LiveIntentionally