Monday, August 5, 2013

with God...

Counseling Session #10

We discussed the nuggets of my Woman Of Faith Conference in Oklahoma City this weekend.  Particularly, the lines from the World Vision video on Friday Night that gripped my heart so hard, tears were flowing down my face as I had the realization that God had a message He wants me to clearly receive and understand completely:


Our stories are powerful.
God speaks to us through our stories.
The choices we make write our stories.
How powerful will your story be?
Allow God to be the bridge for the hurt and pain to connect people.


My counselor is getting really perceptive about me.  Kinda scary.  Kinda exciting.  

In today's session, we are working through my fears of telling my story.  I don't feel my story matters.  I believe I have a story, that's not what I question, I just don't feel important.  When I have shared bits of my story, I get reactions out of people that are hard to face, hard to accept, hard to deal with.  I dread telling more of my story.  

My counselor doesn't believe I have fear, she has only seen a courageous spirit from me.  I believe I am courageous, but not without fear.  Maybe fear is the wrong word?  I don't care what word you use, there is something there, preventing me from feeling I have freedom in telling my story and I believe that I need to figure out why so that I can move past it and face whatever it is.

She reminded me the following:

Your story matters because that's the path God put you down.  Right now telling my story is agony, but with time it will become easier. Your story will touch you the rest of your life.

I will be making a list of the fears I have in telling my story.  I am determined to not quit.