if only I could say the right words

Do you ever have something you want to say to a friend, either in person or in a written format and you don't know how to say it?  Or maybe you just feel that you just don't have the right words?  

Maybe sometimes you know.  You know you don't know how to say it and you know you don't have the right words.

Or maybe you feel you have the right words but you don't know how to convey it to the person you want to share them with in a way that they will understand.

Many times in getting to the message you want to convey, you have to spend time finding the right words.  It is generally in these situations when you are trying to learn how to say something that you will actually give it more thought.  You try to figure out how to say what you feel needs to be said.  You contemplate what the message is that you want to say.  Sometimes it is what you feel should be said, even if it is hard to say.  

Sometimes as you give it thought, the words come and it flows.  Sometimes it takes thought and prayer to find the answer.  Sometimes it comes out all wrong.  Sometimes what you were wanting to convey gets totally misunderstood and taken the opposite way you were intending for it too.  Sometimes what you say just flat out gets taken offense to and makes you wonder why you attempted to communicate at all.  

When you feel there is something you want to share with a friend, there is a reason for that.  Don't second guess yourself.  Be willing to explore the reason you want to share this and build on that.

Sometimes in trying to find how to express it, we have to work through emotions.  These emotions can be Pain.  Hurt.  Discouragement.  Frustration.  Sadness.  Anger.  Resentment.  Or they could be Love.  Joy.  Peace.  Kindness.  Courage.  Faith.  Hope.  They type of emotion doesn't mean the words are any easier to find.  It only shapes the message that you are trying to formulate.  And sometimes you have to work through the emotion before you can figure out the message.

Communication is a tool that deeply develops relationships.  Yet many times when we feel we don't know how to say it or don't feel we have the right words, so we stay silent and the emotions will build.  This usually only makes the communication more difficult, not less.  It generally only creates frustration when we do not feel we can share to be understood, even if its our fault for not being able to communicate effectively.

I want to encourage you today...

The message you are trying to convey may not be done with the right words or in the right way, but do it any way.  Try.  Again.  And again.

Communication is very important to me!  And yet, as much as it is, sometimes it is a difficult process with some people.  I want to stay focused on the reason communication exists is to interchange thoughts, opinions, views and information.  It doesn't mean I will always do it right.  Either in the right time or with the right words, let alone the right method (in person or written).  Nor does it mean I will always be understood or received when I do.  It means that I have attempted a method to share something that is important to me.  It means I am willing to open up a part of my heart and let you into my mind.  Staying focused on this dynamic and being willing to communicate even if I don't always have the right words or say it the right way, gives me the ability to grow and continue to use this critical element as a part of building a relationship.

How do you find what you want to say?  How do you know you have the right words?  What method do you use to improve your communication styles?