Monday, November 28, 2016

Will you take the High Road?

I had a strategic business partner of a client who is working on a project along with me that deleted my 3 emails sent November 15th. They refused to open or read them because they "didn't know me". When I contacted the individual 3 days later to try to follow up and learned of this, I asked why they would do this when my client was copied on the email also, there wasn't any links or suspicious attachments in the emails, the emails were a simply request for data and to set up a meeting to talk. I wanted to know why would they not at least inquire instead of just assume I was spam or a virus? I was told this was their policy. Period. They asked me to resend the emails and I did.

2 weeks later, I still don't have what I need nor have I gotten a response to the 3 original emails that were resent. I sent a 3rd email to follow up. My client contacted me this morning after getting the email and let me know that because I questioned this individuals business processes 2 weeks ago, they refused to get me what I needed or work with me on the project. I said, wow, I am sorry, I had no clue that trying to learn how someone does business would create such a ruckus. What can I do? My client asked that I please contact them and apologize even though this shouldn't be necessary to create a business relationship, and the person got their feelings hurt and shouldn't have over a simple question, and to try to help them understand my perspective that in 20 Years of being in the Industry I was just shocked at how someone would run their business like this and it was something that has never happened to me before. From my perspective my email subject matters were detailed and specific, not suspicious, and I was trying to learn and understand how they operate and how to connect in the future as we jointly work to fulfill their accounting needs.

I did this. I called, said I am sorry I offended you. I am sorry you got your feelings hurt. I am sorry I made you upset. Can we work this out? Can we try to solve this problem? I don't want to have to do double work. I don't want to have to recreate 4 to 5 years of data. We had a 35 minute conversation and we are back on track!

I share this with you to help remind you that:
Sometimes you have to do things that don't make sense. 
Sometimes you have to see it from someone else's perspective. 
Sometimes you have to apologize and try to mend hurt feelings even if you never intended to hurt someone or they shouldn't have taken offense to a question. 
Sometimes for the sake of the relationship you have to take the high road and go beyond the circumstances and connect. 
Sometimes it takes time out of your work and production to share in another's life and help them see you are trying to achieve the same results they are, that you are fighting with them not against them. 
Sometimes it takes courage to be the person who can help them see that they were acting like a little child. 

We all are a work in progress and it helps if you remember that you have acted like a little child or a brat or a bitch or a witch or hurtful no doubt once before with someone and that the only way to repair anything is to be kind.

How will you choose today to be kind?

How will you live out your life to be courageous, be generous, be loving?

You have a choice.
#RelationshipsMatter #ThePowerOfChoice #BeDifferent#ShareInEachOthersLives

What's wrong with: How Can it Get Better than this?

There is a phrase that runs around the coaching circles, especially from some out of Utah, that is frequently used after something good has happened, they ask:   


How can it get better than this?  

The idea around this phrase is to invite more good into your life, that things can get better then they currently are, that this isn't even the top, so don't stop here, there is something better.

I must admit, I am not fond of it. 

I would like to share with you why and get your thoughts.

I believe God has designed us to live an abundant life.  That means when we are fully living connected to Him, seeking Him daily in our interactions with each other, our thoughts and things of concern to us, each day is going to be better than the last.  Because He is building our life.  One piece at a time.  The things we are experiencing now, can't compare to the future.

I believe God wants us to have hope for the future, to believe that the things ahead are better then what we have now, but I do not believe that means that we aren't grateful for the beauty in our life at this current moment.  For when we are truly grateful for the good we already have in our life, that alone allows us to embrace our current life fully.  We aren't longing for more good.  We are thankful for the good we have.  We aren't seeking to one up the good we have.  We aren't challenging God with, this isn't enough, bring on more, we are thankful for the part He already has brought to our life and we let what He has filled our lives with overflow our hearts in the moment.

This isn't heaven, the ultimate good will be made complete then, but we are able to enjoy all the things He has given us here and this should be enough.  We shouldn't be longing and begging for more good.  We have it good.  Here and now.  We truly do!

Lastly, God promises us that each day is a brand new day, full of blessings, and a clean slate.  Our yesterday's are not held against us.  Our future's are not held against us.  We are loved in this moment just as we are.  We have to prove nothing or have nothing we have to get.  We are complete just as we are.  There is nothing, absolutely nothing, better than that! 

How can we be more grateful for the good already that God has bestowed upon us and given to us freely?