Tuesday, April 14, 2015

POEM: The Hidden Life Vision

Where is this life vision? Why is it so hidden from me? How can I find it when he seems so buried deep inside of me? Is it a new vocation? A new designed path? Does it include a man or is this not my path? Is it a chance to pursue the gifts of my past? Why does it elude me? And feel like it's an illusion? How do I recover a dream that seems lost? How does one see what ones called to do? Do you just discover it? Or somehow find clues? Do you just embark on the path in faith believing answers come in the first step? 

As a child, we naturally dream and live big, but as life happens to us, our paths many times are chosen for us. It is likely, our parents will deter us one way or another, church will teach us we can't have this or that, our learning will happen and beliefs will be made, and though we desire to pursue this great dream, the choices we want oh so elude us. 

Then life becomes all out of focus, like a fog, unable to clearly define the view in front if us. This is how we live, day in day out.  Today, we no longer believe in the ability to dream, to cultivate the dreams of our youth and follow this personal pursuit. We no longer feed the life deep inside, we somehow believe it was never inside us. The path becomes harder, to find on our own because the voices we hear are no longer our own. Those days we just dreamed, with all fear aside, to be someone great, the one we feel called from inside. To live in the clouds, where everything is possible, and our dreams always come true, like the stories we read and the ever after viewpoints we so easily believed, the desire now burns deep but remains out of view. 

The older we get, different choices we make, some out of fear, some out of fate, some come from thoughts we never thought we would make. Some out of desperation and a need for a new breath, some from the decisions that seem like regret, some from mistakes, and it threatens to become all we can take. Some yielding situations beyond our control, some create the journey that isn't our choice, some make an impact that that has long lasting effects, but not every moment is just golden in fact. 

The farther we go down the journey of life, we tend to get focused on all of the strife, and discouragement threatens to tear at us like a knife. The red carpet gets pulled out beneath us, the waves of doubt threaten to sink us, it's in these moments of life, we question and wonder the meaning of our life. The dream we lived for no longer exists, in comes the questions did we even ever have any gifts? The stronger we doubt, no longer believe, that we can and we are, worthy of all of our dreams. We can choose, we can be, a life giving vessel with purpose and a plan that is once again renewed in that child like dreamy land. Life has provided experiences and challenged our views, but God has determined the path we will choose. 

How does one see the life driven plan that God has designed all by his hand? How does one create this passion inside to be fully discovered and not run and hide? How does one obtain clarity and a new focus? Can one change ones thoughts and refocus? And discover the right path to the meaning and purpose, to believe in the choice to live out my calling?  The life, the one set deep within my heart, yet completely within my grasp? 

Who cares about reasons, people's words and problems, for I want to live an abundant life clearly focused. A life filled with love, a purpose and plan. An unmundane life, driven to experience every moment completely, designed with my friends and the things that complete me. Unique to just me, one filled with firsts, determined to be, in all areas of life, just perfect for me. To be called with a passion in all areas of life, filled with a heart to live out my life, with courage and inspiration in all that I do, that my paths and journey will support and encourage you. To live fully in the moment and choose the positive thoughts that create a new focus, for I have a calling that's never been noticed. A life lived above what I ever dreamed possible, a life in the dreams of my God given motives. To be someone I want, no matter the voices, with no reason to doubt, no people in focus, aside from all fear and words I have been told that I am not wanted, not worthy, don't matter and can't be someone who should live quite so driven and bold. To open my heart and search for the purpose that fills my life journey in a way in line with this heart felt purpose. 

Oh, what is my vision? What is my calling? What is my dream? How does one find ones mission in life? Where is my God given purpose? I know I will find it. The answers will come. For I am a woman of God and I have the power to overcome. I will pursue this with all my mind, body and soul, for out of it will develop the dreams of my heart!