Tuesday, February 21, 2017

navigating communication paths


Communication can sometimes appear to be a tricky thing.

People say you should be able to say whatever to whomever whenever and if they love you, care about you, they won't let it come between you. They will listen. They will hear you. They will love you.

But do they? Do I? Do we?

Learning when to say what when can sometimes seem like it is a game, a puzzle, or this overly complex situation. But is it?

When we experience negative things from sharing our feelings, we come away with saying that maybe we shared it at the wrong time. Maybe they weren't ready to hear our heart. Maybe we shouldn't have shared at all. Maybe there is something wrong with our feelings. Maybe others just don't get us.

There is the Winnie the Pooh Quote: 
Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.

But is that true?

In theory, it is a good concept, but do we live it? Do we let others tell us how they feel? Do we accept how they feel? Or are we trying to change them into what we want them to feel? What we want them to be?

I tell you how I feel and you get hurt. You tell me how you feel and I get hurt. Now what?

If we were listening, truly listening, would we have gotten hurt? If we saw each others perspectives, truly saw them, would we get hurt? If we were willing to give the friendship the time it needs, would we ask more questions? Give it more space? Would we try to be more empathetic? Sympathetic? Understanding? Loving? Caring? Giving? Encouraging? Even when we were hurt?

I've been doing some reflecting on unconditional love. From several conversations and working through some painful friendships in my own life. I want to learn more about what that means and how to live it out.

What about you? Share with me your thoughts.
#TheSassyVoice #RelationshipsMatter #YouMatter #ThePowerOfChoice

1 comment:

  1. Hmm...about the Winnie the Pooh quote. As much as I love Pooh bear, I think he has this wrong. Even people who "matter" have feelings. I think it still behooves people to use tact when speaking. There is usually a way to be honest in a loving tactful manner. It takes practice to find it and sometimes it takes being quiet for a minute to find the right words to say. If people want my opinion, I will certainly try to be honest in giving it. But I've found that if they don't ask for my opinion, it's ok to not share every thought I'm thinking. These are my spur of the moment rambling thoughts. :-)

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