Tuesday, May 18, 2010
an evening with Terry
We were supposed to go to Russell's for dinner tonight, but Russell is not well so they canceled yesterday. I asked Terry if he wanted to come over to my place for dinner since we already had the time set aside...he said sure. I made him pick what he wanted to eat...he said he wasn't hungry, medicine makes food taste funny, etc...but eventually he came up with a plan. :) We ate breakfast: eggs, hashbrowns, fruit, sausage. I then asked if he wanted to take a walk. We didn't walk far as I knew he couldn't do much, but I want to try to help him in small ways give him zeal for life. He smoked as we walked. We read Psalm 103 together. I then asked if he wanted to run see Ryan & Alisha's house (they closed Friday on a place in Crowley). He agreed, so he drove and I went with him in his car. I say all this to say, he needs this kind of stuff. Normal life things. Peace. Calm. No arguements. No fighting. No drama. No put me downs, you can't do it, you are no good. Nothing like that. We didn't discuss much...I want him to just learn to be different and find the truth in the difference. He did make a comment which I took as headway..."its good to be alive today". I wasn't sure what triggered the thought, he stopped one of his medicines last night and felt better today after feeling crummy for 5days. He can't seem to get over the fact that he just saw Gene Smith who sat by him last Wednesday night and then was in a wreck by the end of the week and will have therapy for 6 weeks. He has made the comment several times. I told him none of us know how long we have, I could be gone tomorrow...he could have been gone when he overdosed. I gave him your email tonight along with the email from Sharron Roy about Gene Smith, and the words to the song I sang as he asked for those since Stan mentioned in his message last Wednesday that I sang on Sunday and he asked me about it today. I had not told him this but think it might work for good in his life by learning about it...he doesn't understand how this has not just torn me apart. Well, it has in moments, but the Lord has given me the strength to face this trial and I want to grow by it...it has not been easy. Singing was not easy...but I wanted to share my heart and I didn't feel a testimony would convey my thoughts very well and I figured I would just cry and nobody would understand anyways.