Friday, November 26, 2010

Terry is gone...

to??? Please pray for him.

He came by my house at 3.15pm or so this afternoon and swept out my garage and shed. I had asked him to do this for me a few weeks ago and he hasn't done it. He knew that if he did, I would pay him to do it. I also packed up two small sacks of food for him to take with him: cheese, pepperoni, olives, applesauce, carrots, pudding, angel bisquit, peanut butter crackers, trail mix, banana, cookies, candy, granola bars, water, and dr pepper. I told him that I love him, am sorry he has made these choices, wish I could offer him a place with me but in light of his choices, I can't. He said he understood. I asked him what else I could have done to help this last year, he told me to quit asking him that, "You have done everything, I have shoved you away and still am". I was surprised he was that clear. He had some self pity moments, frustrated that he has nowhere to go & feeling like all he is is a failure. He said mom & dad are very mad at several here who have tried to help him, that they don't understand mental illness. I told Terry that doing drugs has NOTHING to do with mental illness. I believe Terry needs medicine to cope with his panic attacks and depression, but he is not mentally ill. He is a very capable young man who has made choices to quit and give up. He wanted me to tell him what to do from here, whether to go back to CA or to VA to be with Mindy. He said he can't make decisions. I told him that is not true. He has made decisions all along. Yesterday he chose not to join me at Tom & Jo's for Thanksgiving. The day before he chose to use drugs. He has been deciding that his job was not a real job, not worth it and when he didn't want to work, he wouldn' he lost it. He chose to attempt suicide. I told him, decisions sometimes are hard for me to make too, but he has choices...I have choices and we have to get council and pray about things, but when we do, we must adhere be self disciplined and do to what we are told. I told him whether he realizes it, likes it or not, he is responsible for himself and has been, he just is trying to find ways to cop out. I told him again today as I told him yesterday, he is at a crossroads. He can choose to serve himself and live the street life or he can choose to serve the Lord. It will be a lot tougher now, because he has made some really bad choices, but he can still do it if he wants to.  As he pulled away in his car, he broke down sobbing.

Please pray for him.

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